Tuesday, 18 January 2011

The 'No shit sherlock' Golden Globes wrap*

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I learnt a few things watching the Golden Globes last night. I have admitted how completely out of the loop I am with the Hollywood goss, but seriously... how out of the loop am I?

1. Michael Douglas has throat cancer. When he stepped out on the stage to a massive standing ovation to present an Award, I said to the Geege, "God he looks awful. He looks kind of grey like a Cancer patient". The standing ovation went for a while and I said "Man. What has he done to deserve that?" (I am not a fan, can you tell?). Next thing, I google him and oops, Stage 4 Base of Tongue cancer. Inoperable. Treated with a combination of raditation therapy and chemotherapy. Ouch! He is not long for this world, which is terrible.

2. Natalie Portman is pregnant! She stood up to accept her Award and I said to the Geege "Either she is pregnant or... oh yes, she is definitely pregnant. Who is she even dating?". All was revealed in her speech. She looks fab and will make a lovely Scrummy Mummy.

3. Nicole and Keith have had another baby. Born on December 28, 2010 via a surrogate, Faith Margaret is their biological child (Thank God they didn't call her Tuesday or something equally naff). They sure kept that secret (well from me anyway!)

4. Ricky Gervais is a very funny man (who may be out of a job after last night's controversial comments including inferences that all Scientologists are gay). The best quote of the night for me though: "I'd like to thank God for making me an atheist". Classic.

5. There were some absolute doozies out there in the fashion stakes. Michelle Williams looked dowdy in her beige flower arrangement (which is a real shame because I love her). Hayden Panetierre was flashing her nipple-covering band-aids, which, let's face it, is not a good look. But it was January Jones who was the absolute worst for me. Fabulous hair and make-up but the frock? She looked like a complete tart. Oh Betty. What were you thinking? Her co-star, the delectable Christina Hendricks (see photo above) totally nailed it. But I would only expect that of her.

*Or this is nothing new to the average bear but I learnt a lot.

9 comments:

Quadmama said...

If it makes you feel better, Keith and Nicole didn't announce the arrival of their daughter until Monday (the day after the Globes). And celebrities need to lighten up. If a comedian is going to host a show, you should expect him to make fun of your overpaid behinds.

Cottongirl7 said...

I loved Portman's speech! Made the whole night worth it. Well, not really the night, because I didn't watch the awards. It was fun to look at the hit and miss fashions and see the highlights the next day on the internet! :) Don't worry, I'm out of touch with everything too. :)

Maxabella said...

I can't believe i forgot to watch the Golden Globes!! What am I like!?!

I did scroll through the red carpet wardrobe whilst at work yesterday. My outfit of the night was Heidi Klum (it so often is) and I thought Halle Berry looked dated and try-hard. The nipple shields gave me flashbacks to breastfeeding... not a good look. Poor Hayden, all that beauty without class is a tragic thing. x

Jodie at Mummy Mayhem said...

Well, there you go. I awoke this morning thinking, 'Oh no! I didn't see the GGs!' and my concern over that was for nothing because HERE YOU ARE!

Thanks for all the goss.

You're too funny. You really need to read more New Idea mags or something. ;)

xxx

Joni Llanora said...

I saw it too and though I was squirming with Ricky's statements, it was nevertheless entertaining. I love how Michael Douglas & wife showed up, all happy & cancer-free.

therhythmmethod said...

I am heart broken by January Jones and her titties. She is such a Betty, why did she do 'that'? She looked great last year in a non-revealing black number and headband-thingy (I am up on all this beauty stuff, am I not??)
Big Red was gorgeous, as ever. Bring on the next season of Mad Men, I say. Sick of shit telly!!

therhythmmethod said...

I am heart broken by January Jones and her titties. She is such a Betty, why did she do 'that'? She looked great last year in a non-revealing black number and headband-thingy (I am up on all this beauty stuff, am I not??)
Big Red was gorgeous, as ever. Bring on the next season of Mad Men, I say. Sick of shit telly!!

Christie said...

Well you just told me 5 out of 5 things I didn't know. What's worse, I don't know half of the celebrities you named. Awesome. I'm going to be the very uncool mother of teenagers in the future. Maybe, as Jodie suggested, we should start reading New Idea. Or not.
Poor Michael, that is sad (I know who he is).

MultipleMum said...

Lol Christie! So glad I am not the only one :) Yes. We will definitely need to swat up on all things Hollywood when the kids are teenagers. But New Idea Jodie? Really? Is there no other way????

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