If it is good enough for Leo Babauta...



Image from here

Mr. Zen Habits and I have something in common. We were born in the same year. He had his 38th birthday last month and wrote this post to his children.
I thought I would take a leaf out of his book and pen some words of wisdom for my children.

38 things I have learned in my first 38 years:

1. You will not be the best at everything. Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best (Henry van Dyke). 
2. Work with what you have.There are no guarantees in life.
3. Try to stay in the moment whenever you can. You can learn from the past and plan for the future but the present is where you find happiness and truth.
4. Finding people who 'get' you is pivotal to joy. You don't need to change for people (tweak, yes); you just need to be with people who like you, warts and all.
5. Friends will come and go throughout your life. Swings and roundabouts. Appreciate them when they are there. If you miss them when they are gone, go and find them again.
6. It is okay to fail; what isn't okay is not to try because you think you will.
7. Find the patterns in life. It will help you try new things and tolerate people better. Travel will help with this.
8. Everyone has something good about them. Everyone. Sometimes it is really hard to find but it will be there. Remember this when you are stuck with difficult people and they bore you senseless. Find the good. It will help.
9. Becoming a parent will help you find the real meaning in life. My Mum told me that and I didn't get it until it happened to me.
10. You will never be a 'grown up'. You will mature, yes, but it feels the same in here at 38 as it did at 5.
11. Find work that interests you. Really interests you. You spend a lot of time at work and you should be doing something that makes you happy and contented most of the time.
12. Learn to take care of yourself; to survive on your own. You will be alone for some of your life and you want to know you can manage.
13. Open yourself to people. You will never really know someone else if you don't let them know you.
14. Self-discipline isn't daggy or hard-core. It is a sign of maturity and will help you stay healthy.
15. Bite your tongue sometimes. Just because. Even if you have something incredibly witty to offer, keep it to yourself. It is an important skill to have when talking to a sexist, racist, or homophobe so it is best to get some practise.
16. Your ideas are always unique. Express them freely.
17. Being friends with your family is cool.
18. Your parents will always love you more than you love them. It is a fact of life. You hurt them a lot when you think you are just hurting them a little.
19. If you "see dead people walking around like regular people". Come and see me. I can help you.
20. Most things can be re-purposed. I am not suggesting you hoard 'just in case' but try to re-use stuff when you can.
21. Look after your world.
22. Look after your body.
23. Do not 'google' your medical symptoms on the internet; it will always lead you to think you have cancer.
24. Slip, slop, slap. You won't be biggest fashionista on the beach but you may save yourself from skin cancer and wrinkles.
25. Do not wear your contact lenses longer than the recommended time. It will wreck your eyes and you won't be able to wear them again when you'd like to.
26. There was life before the internet, Wii and even television. Go and explore the outside world. It is more beautiful and inspiring than anything made by us.
27. Learning another language was the best thing I ever did for my world perspective. We are bound by the language we speak to see the world in a particular way. Learn new words; see the world differently. It is as simple as that.
28. Dying isn't the worst thing that could happen to you; sometimes surviving is worse. No heroics for me please.
29. You can always handle what life throws at you. Trust me. Sometimes when the chips are down and you think you just can't take any more, you do. You tackle something else and it frees you from the downward pressure of feeling burdened.
30. Don't try to control things. 'Things' happily control themselves.
31. If someone is throwing up in your Dad's veggie patch, they have a problem. It is called Bulimia and it takes a long time to get over. Try to get help for them.
32. Don't exercise on a twisted ankle. It just gets worse and takes longer to heal.
33. Laughing truly is the best medicine. There is usually a funny side to every tale. Look for it. It will resolve most of life's stresses.
34. There are three types of people in the world. Those who think slipping on a banana peel is funny. Those who laugh because they know the bloke who slipped. And those who laugh because they put the banana peel down in the first place.
35. If you have read and enjoyed a book, don't go and see the movie. It will always disappoint.
36. Finding some space in life is the best thing you can do.
37. No-one will ever walk into a room and know how you were delivered into the world, what your HSC score was or how many dollars you have in the bank.
38. You can never have too many pens, post-it notes, hair-bands or bobby pins. No matter how hard you try, they will always go missing (maybe they are with all the single socks that don't make it our of the washing machine?).

Happy Birthday to me! So happy that the world did not self-destruct! We are having a pyjama day and enjoying the glorious weather.

And now it is your turn to offer your words of wisdom to my children. God knows we could do with a hand here. Drop them a line in the comments. xx